25+ Funny Amazon Reviews Arriving in 2-3 Business Days

Author image for JR Atkinson
JR Atkinson • Writer and Editor
May 14, 2024 1:00 PM EDT

Reviews can either be supremely helpful or profoundly stupid. Sometimes, the right review will tell you exactly what you need to hear. This shoe runs small. Batteries do not come included. This product is for children, dummy. 

But sometimes people leave reviews that are so dumbfounding you have to wonder whether or not they're real. Like when people get overly critical about restaurant service when it's clear they were the ones being a pain in the neck. Or when people rate a product one star for failing to fix their weirdly specific problem, even though that's not what the product was intended for. Or best yet, when someone rates a recipe lowly because they didn't have any of the ingredients, so they had to make weird substitutions, and mashed potatoes somehow turned into mashed baby corn and it was gross. The following list of reviews transcend annoying and become purely hilarious. Five out of five stars. 

Add as a preferred
source on Google
Advertisement
  • 01
    ✰✰✰✰✰ Thank you The Mountain, 4 Jan. 2014 By The Average Consumer I bought this t-shirt for my son, Geoff, two years ago for his birthday. I knew he loved dinosaurs but I didn't realise it would escalate into an obsession. He now goes around the house pretending to be a dinosaur. He would take the eggs from the fridge, go to the toilet and stick it up his colon. Then, when he felt ready, would go on to the driveway, for all the neighbours to see, drop down his pants and it out like a dinosaur on
    via unclefishbits
  • 02
    Amazon Customer September 24, 2018 Verified Purchase Flavor Name: Tasteless Good Lube It's Lube, not much more to say... Sometimes I like covering my body in it and pretend to be a slug while sliding around in my bathroom 218 people found this helpful
    via unclefishbits
  • 03
    JUDUL S Cory H. ✶✶✶✶✶ Order them now Reviewed in the United States on July 29, 2020 Verified Purchase Can I just say that I will be reordering them in every color. Here is me rolling and sliding down a mountain because I was too scared to get up. My leggings did not rip not even a little bit and I got stuck on rocks and trees.
    via unclefishbits
  • 04
    ✰✰✰✰✰ One Star is Too Much for This Product, September 7, 2012 By Cyphis This review is from: UFO Detector - Internal magnetometer interfaced with microcontroller for 24 hour/7 days a week monitoring for magnetic anomalies that have been reported with many UFO sightings (Electronics) I don't know if this is a scam or if mine was broken, but it doesn't work and I am still getting abducted by UFO's on a regular basis.
    via unclefishbits
  • 05
    ryan gerdus February 13, 2019 ✰✰✰✰ Verified Purchase Size: Large Color: Set F Split in the crotch I was wearing these shorts around the house, when a few friends stopped by. We were all sitting around watching TV when i reached at a weird angle for the remote. The crotch seam pulled apart and my I came spilling out right infront of my friends. This was pretty embarrassing. Picture not attached. 108 people found this helpful
    via unclefishbits
  • 06
    10,226 of 10,485 people found the following review helpful ✰✰✰✰✰ Great compliment for my skin art By overlook1977 on May 19, 2009 Color Name: Dark Green Size Name: Medium Unfortunately I already had this exact picture tattooed on my chest, but this shirt is very useful in colder weather. 25 Comments Was this review helpful to you? Yes No 1,627 of 1,736 people found the following review helpful Three wolves is just two wolves plus another wolf By Seth G. Macy on May 19, 2009 Color Name: Dark Gree
    via unclefishbits
  • 07
    Crafting with Cat Hair: Cute Handicrafts to Make with Your Cat $8.97 Prime FREE One-Day Delivered tomorrow for FREE with qualifying orders over $35. Details In Stock. S Worked like a charm. By Rico on July 12, 2014 Format: Paperback I purchased this book as I was tired of people sitting too near me on public transport. 4 Comments 272 people found this helpful. Was this review helpful to you? Report abuse Yes No
    via unclefishbits
  • 08
    Saved My Life, July 21, 2011 By John Neal This review is from: Accoutrements Horse Head Mask (Toy) When I turned State's Witness, they didn't have enough money to put me in the Witness Protection Program, so they bought me this mask and gave me a list of suggested places to move. Since then I've lived my life in peace and safety knowing that my old identity is forever obscured by this life- saving item.
    via unclefishbits
  • 09
    ‹ Unsolved Murder Mystery Game - Cold Case File In... travism We won! Verified Purchase Reviewed in Canada on February 11, 2024 I failed at solving my parents murder when I was a kid. I felt like I let them down by not avenging their deaths. But then one day I found this game. Solving this murder mystery has allowed me to let go of my past. Who needs therapy?! Right?! Thank you for your review. Edit it Delete
    via Frayedbanana
  • 10
    T-Mobile LTE 9:08 AM <= amazon @O 77% Q Q !! SHOP NOW Customer Questions Have a question? Search for answers Q: Can you replace the spray when you run out A: If you "run out" of pepper spray, you need to move to a different neighborhood. K| 3 years ago Q: if i put this in my checked luggage will it explode from the pressure? A: I wouldn't think it would explode Advertisement
    via unclefishbits
  • 11
    < Passion Lubes, Natural Water-Based Lubric... Malcolm Campbell It's been 10 long, amazing years. Reviewed in the United States on October 2, 2011 A little over a decade ago, I bought my 55 gallon drum of lube. I never thought I'd use it all but a few days ago the pump finally ran dry. I've had a lot of good times with it. My wife, too. And not just what you'd think. One day I just hosed down our hardwood-floored hallway so I could use it as a slip-n-slide. You shouldn't think of this as a 'purc
    via unclefishbits
  • 12
    BPS4 TM STAR WARS BATTLEFRONT EA DELUXE EDITION ✰✰✰✰✰✰ Congratulations EA. You earned one star. Additional stars ..., November 18, 2015 By Amazon Customer Verified Purchase (What's this?) This review is from: Star Wars: Battlefront - Deluxe Edition - PlayStation 4 (Video Game) Congratulations EA. You earned one star. Additional stars can be purchased for $5.49 each.
    via unclefishbits
  • 13
    < 14-in-1 Multitool with Safety Locking, Profession... travism Verified Purchase I've got a secret. Reviewed in Canada on January 18, 2024 There is actually a 15th use for this multi tool. This gives it incredible value. If you find a 16th use for it let me know. I doubt you can though. It took me almost a month to get to 15 and I'm pretty smart. Thank you for your review.
    via Frayedbanana
  • 14
    Knuckle Blaster Stun Gun 950,000 Volt by HomeAlarmsAndPersonal SecuritySystems ✰✰✰✰✰ (1 customer review) Like (34) Price: $48.50 In Stock. Ships from and sold by Body-n-Home. Only 1 left in stock--order soon. 15 new from $36.51 1 used from $60.00 See larger image ✰✰✰✰✰ Amazing!, May 14, 2012 By notactuallysteve - See all my reviews This review is from: Knuckle Blaster Stun Gun 950,000 Volt I purchased this after I was confronted by some punks demanding that I hand over my money. I'm a relatively
    via unclefishbits
  • 15
    < Buddha Spices Inc. - Dehydrated Garlic - Ail déshy... travism Verified Purchase I feel Italian AF Reviewed in Canada on January 20, 2024 Style: Dried Garlic Powder Just did a bump of this sweet garlic powder. Wooooooo. What a rush. Everything smells delicious. Thank you for your review.
    via Frayedbanana
  • 16
    < Large Wood Cutting Board from Canadian Maple - A ... travism Verified Purchase Such hard wood. Reviewed in Canada on January 20, 2024 Size: 20x16x1.5 | Material Type: Maple Wood This wood is so hard it makes me feel insecure. Thank you for your review.
    via Frayedbanana
  • 17
    Reviews with images Top reviews Top reviews from the United States Michelle F. Umm Reviewed in the United States on February 28, 2024 Stop making fake stories about this thing. And stop making your reviews so long And no there is not a time travel attachment. 2 people found this helpful Helpful Report
    via unclefishbits
  • 18
    ‹ Yincimar Kids Playroom Rug City Life Playmat Kid... travism Verified Purchase This map is garbage. Reviewed in Canada on January 18, 2024 Size: 5.2'x3'3" I got lost on my way to Toronto trying to use this. Totally impractical. When opened it blocks the entire windshield. Who designed this?! Thank you for your review.
    via Frayedbanana
  • 19
    < Forehead and Ear Thermometer, Digital Infrared T... travism Verified Purchase Doesn't work like my old thermometer. Reviewed in Canada on February 11, 2024 So this wasn't like my last thermometer. It was not supposed to be inserted rectally. Please don't make my mistake. You'll need a new one. Thank you for your review. Edit it D Delete
    via Frayedbanana
  • 20
    Premium Formula Zippo Lighter Fluid Cleaner Burning Improved Ignition Low Odor Combustible para Encendedor 4 fl. oz. (118ml) DANGERFALSALLOWED FLAMMABLE Bad call to the back PELIGRO NOVO INFLAMABLE ✰✰✰✰✰ Delivers what it promises, December 23, 2010 By Corey Verified Purchase (What's this?) It's a can of lighter fluid. It's flammable. There's 4oz of it. Do you want 4oz of flammable lighter fluid? Then this is the product for you.
    via unclefishbits
  • 21
    ✰✰✰✰✰✰ Not a good weapon., September 20, 2010 By Amazon Customer This review is from: Hulk Smash Hands (Toy) I got these in the mail (it was the only present I wanted) and wanted to use them immediately. Y'see, every day when I walk to school these two guys named Ronald and Chester push me on the ground and call me names and say I'm no good. Then they always rip up my homework and take every single one of my pens and pencils away. One time they made me eat a whole pencil and my mouth was bleedin
    via unclefishbits
  • 22
    < Bounce Dryer Sheets, Fresh Linen Scent, 200 Count travism Verified Purchase Does not bounce! Reviewed in Canada on January 18, 2024 Pattern Name: Dryer Sheets Size: 200 Count (Pack of 1) Despite the name this product does not bounce. They float. False advertising if you ask me. And people often do. Thank you for your review.
    via Frayedbanana
  • 23
    WENGER WORLD SCOUT OFFICIAL By Kristi Changed my life, May 27, 2014 This review is from: Wenger 16999 Swiss Army Knife Giant (Tools & Home Improvement) Received this knife as a gift for my 18th birthday. Wish I'd have known what it was because as soon as I touched it, I grew a mustache and became a Navy Seal. Mom fainted and my dad laughed and handed me a beer. I was born a girl. Minus 2 stars because my were really nice.
    via unclefishbits
  • 24
    Incomplete item!, January 5, 2015 BY JOSEPH R FANNING This review is from: 6' Buddha Maitreya the Christ Copper Meditation Pyramid System for Healing - Polished Copper Connectors with 4 Inch Capstone (Health and Beauty) This tent was missing its stakes, tarp, and fly cover. I had to cover it in vines and leaves for my camping trip, and I got soaked overnight when it rained. Coincidentally, my hepatitis is gone now.
    via unclefishbits
  • 25
    ✰✰✰✰✰ Works Great!, November 13, 2012 By LooseSeal Verified Purchase (What's this?) This review is from: Nexus Silent Wired Mouse SM-8500 (Personal Computers) My girlfriend and I were on the verge of breaking up because I would keep her awake at night with my constant mouse clicking. NOT ANYMORE! Consider this relationship saved. This mouse is so silent she will sometimes forget I'm even home and invite her lover over. He's a pretty cool guy.
    via unclefishbits
  • 26
    < Fledano Cervical Pillow for Neck and Shoulder Pain, [... travism Great pillow! Verified Purchase Reviewed in Canada on January 29, 2024 Colour Name: White My wife loves this pillow. Very supportive unlike her husband. Why am I like this? Buy this pillow today! Thank you for your review. Delete Edit Dele
    via Frayedbanana

Want More? Follow Us and Add Us as a Preferred Source on Google.

Tags

reviews amazon review product shopping amazon reviews funny reviews silly memes prime funny pics 1-star-review online shopping mixed reviews silly funny Amazon Prime
Scroll Down For The Next Article